I Want To Tell You That You Are Okay

A-I Want To Tell You 04-16-13Listen to me read this poem for you at this link:
I Want To Tell You That You Are Okay

I want to tell you
that you are okay

I want to be
the flower for you
the small diamond water
of the fountain
with the mossy stones
the clear song of the bird
that breaks your heart
enough
so that you begin
to remember
it’s okay to be alive

I know how hard it is
I have the scars, too
from the jagged monster
who chews its children
and leaves them
tense-boned and
half-alive
the monster of breaking
who fills small bodies
with knowledge so unspeakable
that the most golden of bells
can make no sound

but my love
if you keep hope
behind the wall
it is no good
no good
you have to walk out
into the open now
though every sinew
curdles
for bone and will
have done their work
they have brought you
here
but they are
useless creatures
when confronted
with kindness

what was given to you
long ago–
the sad old spasm
of protection–
with that you
can never know honey
you can never truly
deeply
laugh

oh, those old wars
they are over and gone
instead
my warm hand is here
and I’ll tell you
over and over
with the eloquent language
of my fingers
my breath
my eyes that have seen
death and lived
I will tell you gladly
that we are home at last
alive most deeply
in our own dignity

though the hired warrior
has kept you walking
let him lay down
in the garden’s earth now
and sumptuously rot
kindly let him come apart in
worm and root
till his hollowness
has healed into
the soft den of an animal

you have always been
the untarnishable gold bell
and the crazy wild heart of its
star-made clapper
and it is time, my love
for you to
ring

© Kathleen Dunbar

Photos by Kathleen Dunbar

Please also explore a song of connection and love in this crazy life, from my first CD, “Finally Home,” called Round and Round. Here’s the direct link to the song on Bandcamp, or at explore my music at www.kathleendunbar.com

A-I Want To Tell You 04-16-13

A Little Bit Of Yum

A-A Little Bit Of Yum 03-26-13

a little bit of yum

a little bit of yum
a crumb
a crunch, a bite
and then we’re done.
tidbit, morsel, taste, a drop
a soupçon, nosh
and then we’ll stop.

ambrosia, nectar, we adore
if only just . . .
one mouthful more!

a delectable, a relished heat
to finish off that spicy treat
the midnight hankering for flavor
the craving for the thing we savor
chocolate rapture, rich delight
upon the palette erudite
we nibble, lead by inward urge
oh just this once
no harm to splurge!
the dazed give-in
to appetite.

the moment best
when we can let
the nectar linger,
longing met. . .
it’s not the taste
though that does please
it’s the yearning of
the heart for ease—
and scary! to admit the ache
much easier to reach for—
cake!

we’re vulnerable when we believe
that we could let ourselves
receive
the sustenance to mend our hurt—
that kindness is our just dessert
and hunger is a thing to show, so
take the meal,
and eat it—slow—
in the savoring
the heart will know. . .

. . . the honey, goody, nibble of
the sweet we really want
is love.

© Kathleen Dunbar

Photo by Kathleen Dunbar

Here’s a little bit of music yum, my song We All Love You on Bandcamp and at my website www.kathleendunbarmusic.com

Lakshmi Appears In The Form Of An Old Lady

A-Lakshmi Poem 03-15-13 Lakshmi Appears In The Form Of An Old Lady

There is an old lady
getting out of a geriatric van
that gives an hydraulic sigh
I can hear all the way into the café
as it whooshes three precious inches
closer to the pavement.
The old lady is
just making it away from the van steps
with the help of a wheely-walker
and two extra sets of arms:
the van driver with a “help the old lady smile”
and a younger woman
in an official-looking smock—
together they are the four-armed deity
who helps the old lady descend from on high.
They thread their way from the street
through an empty parking space,
just makin’ it up on the sidewalk
perilously close to teetering over
and scraping the walker
on the special silver gunmetal paint job
of the $130,000 Porsche
in the parking space
next to their adventuresome path.
I sip my tea and watch through the coffee shop window
exhilarated with the effort,
my own muscles firing sympathetically
to help maneuver the walker
on it’s perilous way.
The Porsche’s driver is not in the car.
It’s a close call, but—
they make it!
The old lady waves goodbye to the two
and looks ahead at the freedom and delights
of the neighborhood stores—
grinning like a maniac
she sports her own
special silver gunmetal paint job
in the coloring of her hairdo
and the sensible lines of her walker.
She’s made it out of wherever she lives
and into the thick of things,
back in the hood!
The van pulls away
and the old lady delightedly
guns it down the sidewalk
as the driver of the Porsche appears,
unaware she is covered
in the dust of the old lady’s getaway.
The Porsche driver,
a bored-looking, able-bodied woman
perhaps oblivious
at this moment
of the great gift of physical mobility
hangs up her cell phone, sighs,
and slips into her sexy machine.

I finish my tea.
The old lady has gone her way down the street
and the woman in the Porsche has driven off
in the opposite direction,
the parking spaces
filled now with ordinary cars. . .
when suddenly I hear laughter
arising fresh from my depths,
the sound splashing between the café windows
and the espresso machine.
My friend the young barista catches the wave
and calls out to my delight,
“That’s Kathleen Dunbar in the house!”

I aim someday
to be such an old lady
with a well polished gleam
in my eye,
but it is so radically honest
so difficult
so irrational and
such the right thing: to be here
to surrender to the laughter and surprise
of standing upon this moment
to savor my body drenched in this life.

Thanks to the old dear
I catch a glimpse of myself as I truly am,
bejeweled and dazzling
astonished at the bling of me
of us all
of our fine wide souls when we let them shine!
I’m worn out from working so hard
when it’s not necessary.
I unabashedly laugh out loud
through my sweet warm tears,
I grin like a maniac!—
these are my acts of gratitude
in the wake of an old lady
disguised as Lakshmi.

© Kathleen Dunbar

Photo of Flowers on My Altar, and The Porsche Lady’s Car by Kathleen Dunbar

To hear a sweet inspiring song of mine called We All Love You click on this Bandcamp link, or find it on my webiste: kathleendunbarmusic.com

A-Lakshmi poem 03-05-13

“I am walking in jeweled shoes” –a Valentine’s Day poem

A-Heart10

I am walking in jeweled shoes

I am walking in jeweled shoes
the people have made them
for my feet
in joy they have made them
from the dark earth
from the blind earth
from the old earth
the earth has cooked up
red and turquoise and blue
these are her spirit dreams
from deep inside her body
and the people have gathered them
with their hands
of honey color
and love
oh the people of my village
celebrate my going
to you
they have given me
this gift
so that I may walk in beauty
and feel the earth hold me
all the way down
they are the gift for me
joy-woman
as I open my heart
to my man
and dance
in wild amazement!

you and I will not hear the jewels
of my shoes
begin to sing
as I slip them off
this one
that one
your hand helping
but they do
in high and low voices
the people have placed them
soft handed and teasing
tenderly and wise
upon my feet
we cannot hear their song
lost as we are
in our succulent beginning
our wild sacred dance
but we have been
well blessed
we have been blessed
all the way
down

© Kathleen Dunbar

photo by Kathleen Dunbar

here’s a love song to listen to from my new cd The Storm in Our Head, called Cello Song
find it on my website, too www.kathleendunbarmusic.com